262804066 122. Egg Freezing as a Single Mom: From Fertility Fears to Freedom - Beyond Awareness: Closing the Gap Between Knowing and Doing

Episode 122

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Published on:

4th Mar 2025

122. Egg Freezing as a Single Mom: From Fertility Fears to Freedom

Ever done something for one reason, only to discover it gave you something completely unexpected? 🤯 That's exactly what happened when I froze my eggs last year!

In this vulnerable episode, I'm sharing how preserving my fertility options ironically freed me from wanting to have more children. This journey taught me powerful lessons about releasing control, redefining self-care, and embracing what's right in front of me instead of constantly chasing the "next thing."

If you've ever felt stuck in perfectionism, overwhelmed by life's expectations, or caught in that cycle of always planning for what's next instead of enjoying what's now...this one's for you! 💗

Chapters:

[1:21] Why I decided to freeze my eggs at 36 years old

[7:26] Unexpected realizations & how to journal through anxiety (starting at 8:10)

[11:13]How getting my eggs frozen changed my perspective on having kids

[14:55] Ways I reduced the need for control, perfectionism, over-achieving and restlessness (sabotage patterns)

[17:13] How to get time to slow down with your kids

[19:50] Invite to the Self Sabotage Detox group coaching program starting March 10th

What You'll Learn:

👉 The emotional reality of making big life decisions after divorce (and grieving the life you thought you'd have)

👉 How I used strategic journaling to overcome intense anxiety during my egg-freezing process (this works for any anxious moment!)

👉 Why asking for help was one of the hardest (and most necessary) parts of my journey

👉 The surprising shift in perspective that came after securing my "backup plan"

👉 How this experience transformed my approach to dating, perfectionism, and self-care

Journal Prompts to Reflect On:

  • Where might you be holding too tightly to a plan or timeline in your life?
  • What would feel different if you secured an option but released the need for it?
  • How is perfectionism or control showing up in your daily life right now?
  • What "next thing" mentality might be keeping you from enjoying what's already in front of you?

Resources Mentioned:

  • My divorce story "The One Where She Chose Herself"; Episode 4: Listen on Spotify
  • Egg Freezing & Egg Retrieval Process: Episode 59
  • "Worst-case solution" journaling technique (detailed at 8:10)
  • Join the Self Sabotage Detox by Friday March 7th (capped at 6 women only): https://www.samanthapenkoff.com/offers/Sk7EDxEt/checkout

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this episode! Did any part of my story resonate with you? DM me on Instagram @samantha.s.says or leave a review to let me know.

More Ways to work with Samantha:

1:1 coaching: Now accepting applications, 4 spots open. Apply here.

Self Sabotage Detox: A 5-month group coaching program where you'll identify the areas of your life that you sabotage your peace, presence & connection with others. You'll learn how to disrupt those patterns in real-time and have the support of a community of women to hold you accountable so that you're in control of your emotions & days. Click to enroll for the Spring cohort.

Emotionally Empowered: The BEST (and maybe only) journaling membership on the internet that focuses on taking your big emotions & situations and transforming them into the clarity + direction you need to get what you want...combined with a 24/7 uplifting community. You receive journal prompt flows, journaling workshops and special 'Breakthrough Themes'. Access it all with a 7 day FREE trial!

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About the Podcast

Beyond Awareness: Closing the Gap Between Knowing and Doing
Closing the Gap Between Knowing and Doing
Beyond Awareness (formerly Journal Entries) is for successful women in leadership and business who know exactly what they need to do but can't make themselves do it.

You know you need to prioritize yourself, delegate more, set boundaries, stop bringing work home. You've tried therapy, coaching, retreats. You know the solution - but you either can't follow through, or when you DO, it doesn't stick.

Host Samantha Hawley helps business owners and executives earning $100k+ excavate the root beliefs underneath the execution gap. Why do you keep not doing the thing? Why doesn't it feel better when you do? Using strategic journaling and emotional excavation, we go beyond awareness into why you're actually stuck in the pattern.

This isn't about more tactics or tips. This is about understanding why awareness isn't enough and what actually needs to shift for you to change.

You'll hear about: decision fatigue, why you can't prioritize yourself, nervous system regulation, being present with your kids, root cause of overwhelm, why boundaries don't stick, self-sabotage patterns, and how your internal state impacts everything.

Perfect for: Female CFOs, VPs, directors, executives, business owners, and women in leadership who are tired of knowing what's wrong but not being able to change it.
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Samantha Hawley