270. The #1 question for when you’re not getting what you want

Sam - Clarity Coach (: 00:00

Welcome to Beyond Awareness. I asked myself one question recently, and I cannot unsee it. You know, that that quote, I can't unthink it. I just keep asking it to myself because it was so powerful and it's had such a huge impact. So I'm going to tell you what that question is so that you can think through it and you don't even need to journal on it, truly. It's just something that once you hear it too.

You're, I think you're gonna start thinking about how it applies to you. And if not, I'm gonna guide you through that. And it's going to be really eye-opening on what it is that's happening in your life. And then on Thursday, I'm gonna have a complementary strategic journaling episode so that you can actually apply it to your life as well. So the question that I ask myself is what feedback is the universe showing me?

This is different than any other prompt I've journaled through or asked myself before because it forces me to think about what's actually happening, not what I want to have happen. So this isn't like, dear universe, this is what I want, or thank you for this. It's not an affirmation. It's what is actually showing up for me right now. What conversations am I having?

What like what truly is going on in my life? And this one question has helped me feel so much lighter because I didn't realize the weight of what I've been forcing in my life. And I say force it's so nuanced because I say forcing what I want or what I thought I wanted. So what I've been focusing on.

versus what's been actually happening is kind of different. What I've been focusing on for the past many years, I would say, are things like overwhelm, stress at work, and being present with family. And that's not like I mean that in the sense of that's what I'm focusing on with my clients.

With when I put content out, that's when I'm focused on helping women who feel overwhelmed, women who want to leave work at work, women who are super stressed and want to, you know, learn how to emo emotionally regulate, women who want to be present with their family, that sort of thing. But when I ask myself, what feedback is the universe showing me? And I'll get into like what feedback actually is.

I realized what's actually showing up for me is all of that. So it is the overwhelm. It is the stress at work, but it's more specific. It's overwhelmed with ideas. It's overwhelmed with the nonstop reminders in their brains. The conversations that I'm having with women isn't just, they're not just saying I'm overwhelmed. They're saying, Sam, I they're not even saying the word overwhelmed at all.

They're saying, I have so many ideas, but I have no time to actually implement them. Or I have so many ideas and I'm just so scatterbrained and I want to do these things and I am doing some of them, but I'm kind of half assing them, and I can just sense the overwhelm. You can probably even sense the overwhelm in that, right? Or they're just telling me how busy they are. And no matter what planner they have, no matter how many reminders they have on their phone.

Or calendar reminders they have, they're just so busy. And then when they aren't busy, when they have time to themselves, they they don't know what to do with it. Right. And that's truly a big reason why I created lighter, which is the 12-week experience where I help you feel lighter no matter what is on your to-do list. So I'm not gonna go into that. Check the link in the show notes if that interests you. But another thing is lack of systems.

in place for their business. That keeps coming up in conversations. So they feel like they can't implement all those ideas or they just crave systems. A lot of the women that come to me and that I'm chatting with and working with and even reflecting back, this this wouldn't necessarily be an answer to what is the universe showing me? Because this is a past client situation. But a lot of my past clients, we've worked on systems in their business.

So that they can feel more organized. But the third thing that's coming up for me right now, the feedback that I'm getting, is around email marketing campaigns, which it puts a smile on my face. And you can probably hear that and see that if you're watching this. But I was recognized recently for helping a business create a five-week email marketing plan and like a sales landing page.

For something that they were offering. And she actually reached this business reached her goal on day two. It was a five-week campaign. And she reached her goal on day two. And so because of this, she was like, Well, we have all of this amazing landing page. We have all of these emails scheduled out. We might as well extend our goal. So she extended her goal.

And she ended up reaching that goal of the number of people signing up in four weeks. And so she had to end the launch early. And she had a full extra week prior to like the actual program starting, just for her to prep on her program, focus on delivery, making sure that it was really great. And so I was recognized for this publicly.

And after that, I so many natural conversations happened. People started coming to me and asking me questions. I helped one business owner transition to a business account on Venmo so that she could look more professional and start receiving tips. There are some issues with that. but so she might be considering other options, you know, like Stripe and different payment.

processors, but still, like rant so random that I helped that woman with that. I answered a different business owner's question about email systems. Like out of nowhere, she messaged me and asked me about who I use for to write emails. And it was off of an Instagram story I shared that was not about emails. I was like, huh, interesting that the universe, you know, that's what was sent my way.

I also had a call with a different business owner about her ideas and how I can actually help her implement them instead of just having them pile up so that she can have a real maternity leave where she's actually focused on resting and on her baby instead of doubting her income or even having more ideas swirling around in her head that whole time and questioning if she could be more efficient or effective.

in certain areas during that time or when she comes back. So we ha I had that call. I've actually been hired to help another business with her upcoming Black Friday and Cyber Monday launch because yes, it's already time to think about that now, which is crazy. And lastly, I've been asked to create a pitch for a business on how I can help them import contacts to an email system and then start emailing them.

Since they've had this list of contacts of hundreds of contacts for years, and they've done nothing with it because they just don't have time or interest. And they've always felt like it's a missed opportunity. Like they know that they should, quote unquote, should be emailing. But again, they just don't want to. They don't have the time. They don't have the knowledge to do that. So they want me to create an outline and we have a meeting scheduled. So when I think about that question again, of

What feedback is the universe showing me? It is helping women with overwhelm and stress at work so that they can be present, but it's very much more guided towards business, like helping business owners and even email marketing. And the truth, if I'm being really honest with myself, it's that I love talking about business. I geek out over it. I did a post recently.

I may have even done a podcast episode about it or mentioned it in one where I was talking about my podcast analytics and how once I've rebranded this past January, my analytics have skyrocketed. I have many more listeners, and my listeners listen longer. So thank you for being here. Loving you and loving that you get more out of my episodes. I do feel so aligned, but I just love

diving into the analytics and the business talk. And that's always been a layer in my conversations with my clients, but definitely like with my friends and other like business coaches. I even talked to my business coaches about their businesses. And with my past clients, we've talked about like their SOPs, simplifying projects, marketing without the overwhelm, like why it's so hard to trust yourself versus

Doing more all of the time. So it's always been an element, but I never wanted to call myself a business coach because there are so many out there. And that was that is still a huge limiting belief of mine, is that like everyone is a business coach.

but the fact that people are literally coming to me for this type of advice feels so light. It feels easy. And one limiting belief that I've worked through within the past few months is that if it feels easy, it's not not worth it, but it's

I shouldn't be successful if it's easy. It needs to be hard. I need to work hard. And so if it's easy, it's something's wrong. I need to make it hard, essentially. So I've I've worked through that and I'm still consciously, intentionally working through that. But when these conversations are happening right now, it feels light. It feels easy. In fact, the our newest member of the Leader's Table literally came to us by finding us from Google.

Like a literally a Google search and filling out our application. She did not come to us from me having a full conversation with her, telling her all about it, following up, following up again, right? All of that. No, it was so easy. She filled our application. I reached out to her, answered her questions, and she signed up. So if maybe you can relate to all of that, maybe you feel it a little bit differently.

Like you quote unquote should focus on your career and then come home and focus on being a good mom, if you will, even though what you really want to do is write a book or pursue a different passion of yours or expand your business. But you don't do those things because you think it takes more energy and time than you have to offer. So you keep it separate.

Kind that's kind of like what I've been doing. It's like I've loved talking about business, but I've been keeping it separate because of different limiting beliefs. And I've just been feeling like it's two separate things. It's my, you know, not necessarily life coaching, but like strategic clarity coaching. And then separately there's businesses. Right. So we keep our passions separate out of fear and shoulds and expectations.

We're gonna be going over so many other questions, like the one we started out with and more, that will actually get you to think differently and rewire your brain. It's like a double whammy to live a lighter life, not by changing your to-do list, but by lessening the weight of what's on your plate inside my 12-week experience called Lighter. It starts the week of September 14th. So

Click the link in the show notes for full details on that. But I want to clearly say that I'm not suddenly going to become an email marketer or a business coach. Writing has always been a passion of mine, which is why I love journaling. In fact, before a strategic clarity coach, I called myself a journal coach. And I love coaching women through systems, specifically why they don't need another system yet. They need to trust themselves more. But that one

Question has helped me see that there is actually more of a blurred line between what I'm currently doing and this other passion of mine than I thought. I thought these two were distinct passions that I had to keep separate, like I said earlier. And I thought that way. I thought I had to keep them separate to protect my image and to differentiate myself.

So that I wasn't a business coach. I wasn't them. I'm actually over here in my own lane, not selling as a business coach. I am Sam, the strategic clarity coach, the journal coach, right? And the conversations that I've had this past month have shown me that I actually need to work less hard, way less hard.

When I'm aligned in this way, when I'm actually honest with myself about the fact that I love geeking out about business stuff, I love answering your questions about email systems, about which one I use. I loved helping that woman who just wanted like a more professional way for people to send her money. And we tested out Venmo business. I love trying new things in the business space. I love my best friend Ashley.

We talk about business ideas nonstop via voice message. Like I am getting goosebumps as I say this just because I love it. Like that's what I love. And so honoring that, not judging myself for it, not separating that part of me and saying, nope, that's over here. That's only if, you know, certain people ask me about that. But seeing that that's what the universe is sending me. Why have I been pushing so hard against it?

That's the second question that I could ask myself. Because when I'm combining all of my passions, leadership, coaching women, systems, especially email marketing, that's when I've literally been recognized and invited into opportunities, which my projector heart thrives in. I'm a projector in human design. And it's easy. And it feels light and it feels amazing.

And so I leave this with you today. Stop focusing on what you want to have happen just for a second, a minute, a day, if you can, and think about what feedback is the universe actually showing you? And you can think through that for the rest of today, or this could be a tiny little prompt that you just think about at the end of every day, so that you put a pin in what you want to have happen, not that we're ignoring it.

But first, or maybe after, we think, okay, yes, that's what we want. That is our goal. We honor that, validate that. And this is what's actually happening in my life. And then on Thursday in a couple days, I'm gonna have a strategic journaling episode to help connect the dots so that we can see what's happening in our life and if it is aligned with what we want.

how to go about that. If it's not aligned, how to go about that, we'll do all the the dot connecting on Thursday. So thank you for being here. Again, that question is what feedback is the universe showing me? I will see you on Thursday.